Yes, I know.

I got suckered in via the netterflix, then succumbed to the cult like demands that i must consume the actual book lest i be one of those lightweight fly-by-night konmari fakers of (unfolded) pants. I apologied to the waterstones assistant for being an utterly feckless sheep by buying it. I dont think she cared. Maybe she's a closet sock rolling nut job too. I bought it in Stirling for what turned out to be a three train, 4 hour train journey home after another days training. I read it by the second train, obscuring the cover in the hope people would think I was reading How to Kill a Mockingbird instead of a fekkin' self help book on how to roll bloody socks. On the back of today's training and reading, I am now proficient in overseeing criminal records checking and folding pants, mwhahaha.

I also bit into a cadbury's creme egg and my front tooth fell out around about Falkirk. All in a day's work.