Weird Squid Tree

My Dear Fellows & Dear Princess,

Do you see it? I totally see a weird squid. 

Today, Lemon amused me by telling me about her grandson. I do not know his name. She never uses it. She always just calls him, "The Boy". 

Actually, he was just "The Baby" for ages, but then his mother had ANOTHER baby. So he became "The Boy".

He has a couple of weird habits. Firstly, he likes to sit on other children. This is a problem, because he's apparently HUGE, like a monster baby. His mother says it is very embarrassing because she will suddenly realise she is getting the hairy eyeball from another mother at play group. She will follow their gaze and realise that The Boy is settling down with satisfaction on some other child, with Other Child invariably wriggling and struggling for breath.

So there's that.

But also he has a weird habit whenever Lemon introduces him to a stranger. He's apparently quite an affable, talkative little chap, even if all of his chat is complete gibberish, but if an adult he does not know asks him a question, he will just FREEZE. 

Like if he stays still. 

And just doesn't move. 

No-one will realise he is still there. 

He is convinced he has become. 

INVISIBLE

"He doesn't even breathe," Lemon told me. "And he stays like that until the other person goes away. Then he starts chatting and moving about again."

The reason I find this amusing is that Lemon has started doing it for comedy reasons. In Skype meetings, she'll be sitting next to me when one of our stakeholders or one of our developers asks a difficult question.

I look over. She has frozen. Sometimes her coffee-cup is halfway to her mouth. I have to MUTE my headset to avoid sniggering right into the ear of our stakeholder.

It made me think of White Lines (Don't Do It). Whenever that would play at school discos and it got to the "FREEZE..... ROCK!!" section, everyone had to freeze. And then to rock. 

I wonder if that is where The Boy got it from? 

Probably not.

S.