Why can't I do this?

For the past three years I have been struggling with a novel. Admittedly, it has not been the only thing I have been struggling with, but it is currently the thing I have been struggling with for the longest.

I have the idea and the voices and the story. What I don't have is the way to link them together. Characters speak to me (OK, maybe the novel isn't the thing I have been struggling with for the longest) but finding the way to get them all talking together on a page has proven to be elusive.

I need to tear the whole thing up and start again. But this has to be combined with other needs. Like contributing to the family budget and participating in family life. 

The whole thing is teetering on a precipice. Either I do it or I don't. 

And don't get me started on self-doubt.