A Lazy Saturday Morning

This is how we're starting - Callie is on the pillow next to me on this lazy Saturday morning. We're trying to figure out our life.

A few months ago, we made a bad decision to embark on a new career endeavor in a new place. A new job in a new state just about a year after my mom died. 

In this year I've learned that cats go through grief just like human's do and that grief (in itself) also just really sucks. 

My life has transcended from a 25 year healthcare career in caring for others (while my parents were also both working on getting care for their illnesses). As a family we had an agreement that no matter where we were in the country, we would live within an hour from any major airport in case things didn't go well and they needed support. 

In 2014 Mom informed me that she needed help with caring for my dad. It was a challenge because I still had to give my landlord notice and figure out what to do with all of my belongings. On the morning I spoke with her, she informed me that if I left before giving them enough time, I would lose my deposit and be charged a cleaning fee.

It was an exasperating situation. 

Not being sure what to do and needing to think a little, I drove to Home Depot (a great place to go when you need to wander mindlessly and think about the way your life is going) to look for boxes and tape.

As I was wandering, my cell phone rang. When I said "hello?", my landlord was on the other end and said "I have someone who is interested in your apartment, can you move out in two days?" "But what about the deposit? what about the cleaning fee?" I asked. 

"You won't be charged anything" she said. 
"Done!" I told her. 

Thankfully, I have the best friends in the world who came to help. In two days, my belongings were in storage and I was in the car with my two cats, Nate & Chester, and on my way to Florida. 

In 3 days I was in Florida catching up with Mom and Dad.
30 days later, Dad lost his 25 year battle with Cancer. 

Within a week after his death, mom's memory decreased quickly and my 3  year caregiving journey began. 

3 1/2 years later, on a cold February morning in 2018 after we had moved home to Rhode Island, she died from the community acquired pneumonia that took her during her sleep. She always said to me "Pneumonia is a friend of the aged, it takes you in the middle of the night when you are sleeping", which is exactly what happened. 

I am consistently conflicted - on one hand I'm glad she made it back home to see her friends. On the other hand, I haven't heard of anyone dying from community acquired pneumonia while living in Florida. 

Since then I have moved 3 times. My cat Chester died about a year after dad did and then Nate (my other little guy) died about a month ago. Mom's Maine Coon cat Trey was really struggling after mom's death so my brother and I decided that he would be better back in Florida with him and Callie has stayed with me - where she is now - sleeping on the pillow beside me while I try to figure things out. 

Sometimes when I feel really confident I tell her "we'll figure it out." But most days, I don't have a clue so I just put one foot in front of the other and keep going.