I'm not that bloody fat

Honestly, this isn't what it looks like. 

It's not like one of those scales in a 1970s comedy, where an extremely fat person tries to weigh himself on a talking scale, and all you hear is "One Person at a Time, please".

Or maybe it is. 

We took Ottawacker Jr. to the Aviation Museum in Ottawa. It was a self-preservation exercise really, as he had been asking for a flight simulator for Christmas. He has no idea (a) what a flight simulator is; (b) how it works; (c) what it costs; (d) what the chances of his getting one are. Unfortunately for him, I do. And Ottawa's brilliant Aviation museum has one.

Sadly, he enjoyed it - but not that much - so we took him for Dim Sum afterwards. 

Now the crux of this blip is to rail against the cost of museums in Ottawa. It is absolutely scandalous that you have to pay exorbitant prices to get into national museums. This is depriving thousands of kids of invaluable education. The first thing I will do when I am President of the World is make all museums free. Actually, that is the second thing. The first thing I will do is ban all tabloid newspapers.

And I am not that fat.