Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,

It's a little-known fact that traditional Scottish haggis has been banned from the USA since 1971. There would appear to be a lucrative trade in smuggling the authentic thing into America from Canada, but the smugglers do this at great risk.

I bet there are haggis-sniffer dogs at each point of entry and armed guards stationed at strategic points along the border with shoot-to-kill orders for anyone suspected of carrying an illegal haggis. It was difficult enough getting past unfriendly and humourless armed government officials when we went to Florida to go to Disneyland 7 years ago....and that was without a haggis!