Can blip for an inquiring journal entry

The blip has absolutely no meaning at all today, but I have something to say.

How is it that people are capable of lying to themselves without even realizing it, but when you deliberately try to fool your emotions, you can't do it?

I said "I don't care. Whatever." Today I was crushed when I found that it wasn't whatever and I do care. Why couldn't I fool myself?
Because I was planning it?
Because I thought it would save me from tears and disappointment?
Yes and yes.

This leaves me thinking about what I once heard: "People are capable of lying to themselves about anything." Is that only when you do it by accident and therefore cause yourself more damage?

So there is no way to protect your feelings - you either fail your on purpose lying or your by accident lying fades away?

What do we learn? Be honest and get hurt, that's the human way.