The Blind Salesman

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellows,

Isn't there a joke about a naked lady and a blind salesman from the 1970's? It ends with the line, "Now where do you want these blinds?" and was told by Tommy Cooper. Or someone like that.

Anyway. We had a blind saleswoman come to our house today. I was not naked. 

It is all part of Caro's postponed housey project that is now coming back to life, like a bud reopening after an unexpected Spring frost. And I really appreciated it. We REALLY need blinds in our living room.

The reason being - and I am sure I have mentioned this before - is that our living room catches the sun in the afternoon. It is really very pleasant in a way. Even on the coldest of days, it is like we are in a greenhouse from around noon onward. 

But now that we are heading into Kiwi Winter, the effect is exacerbated. In the mornings I have to put heaters on to warm the place up and this continues until about 11am at which point Caro and I say, "It's time for the changeover," at which point we switch the heaters OFF and open the back door or we cook in here. It really is that quick and that extreme.

Then, at around 3pm, the low winter sun hits us on the couch and we find ourselves boiling hot and blinded. At the moment we have no curtains* so I hang blankets from the curtain-rail to give Caro some relief, while I avoid the sun by sitting on the floor. This goes on until 4pm, when the sun passes. 

Then the temperature PLUMMETS again and the air-conditioning goes off, the door gets closed and the heater goes back on. 

The Blind Lady explained that her super-deluxe blinds would eliminate the need for all that malarkey. And Caro has been doing her research** and knows exactly what she wants, so now we are awaiting a quote.

It's strange. All these quotes/bookings are happening within days of each other. I think in my near future there will be a single week where our house gets improved all at once. It will be just like a house programme. I might even do that thing where I get Caro to lead me into a room with my eyes covered so she can do "the reveal" and I can cry and tell her how it has changed my life. 

It is like living with Anna Ryder-Richardson or The House Doctor.

S.

* The house did actually come with curtains, but they were old, disgusting, moth-eaten and dusty. So Caro threw them out. Which we now regret.

** By means of watching "Grand Designs", "George Clark's Old House New Home" and "Selling Houses Australia".