Gone

I was at the farm shop bright and early. 09:00.  

I filled my trolley and then sat down to enjoy a coffee. It was 2ºc. They don’t have heaters. They don’t offer blankets (they used to, but… the virus). 

Anyway, I enjoyed it twice over because under Level 4 it will be takeaway only. 

My Cousin Mike phoned while I was driving home. He did not leave a message. I could guess what that meant. Who was it?

It turned out his sister’s ex-partner Bryan has died. What a complex story all that is, but perhaps for another time. Bryan and my Cousin Liz were a huge support to me about 10 years ago during a dreadful phase in my life. He was still “family” after they split up. 

It started with my late dad going into hospital, from where he went to a care home and died 9 months later. Meantime my late mum - living alone now and refusing all support - embraced dementia with a vengeance. After a few months she too ended up in hospital, and then the same care home. 

All this was had a fairly disastrous impact on my personal and home life. 

Occasional escapes up the A9 to stay with Liz and Bryan helped me to get through it. They were living in Findhorn, which is where that side of my family has its roots, and being in a place so evocative of happier times was therapeutic too. 

Bryan was the epitome of the articulate, intelligent, cultured Irish, and of course great craic. He never quite recovered from finding himself single again in his late 60s. A spark was missing. 

ceol