The artist.

I was invited round to D's for a poker night with some of his pals who had travelled up from London to see the match between Crystal Palace and Sheffield United. I've never played poker so I was fully expecting to be separated from my cash in the first couple of rounds.

D had told me that the stakes were kept at 10p and 20p, so I rolled up with a plastic bag full of change only to find out that he had proper chips, the idea being that everyone bought £20 worth!

Anyway, having feared the worst, I ended up with £50 to my name when the taxi arrived to take me home at 2am, all rather embarrassing considering my novice status.