Trespass

I put one foot across the border from England to see what would happen.
Sirens went off.
Police jumped out of the hedges & beat me with leeks.
I am currently typing this from a prison cell.
Thank god I have watched pulp fiction and had the presence of mind to hide my phone up my ass.

(obv nothing happened, I was there for work, popped in, did what I needed to do, then left)