Stuck indoors

No opportunity to get outdoors today, so I’m stuck with photographing the naughty bits of flowers again. Mr A suggested a walk this morning, but it was pretty grey and grim and I needed to get on with a document, plus I was doing a Barre class which cut across the suggested walking time. Later on, after lunch, when I’d more or less cleared the decks, I thought about a walk, but by then it was far too windy to be pleasurable, and it was chucking it down. Tomorrow seems better in terms of weather, and my calendar is a bit less packed.

Later on I chaired a webinar, but we had a disappointing number of questions. It’s been suggested that perhaps the subject matter was a bit too broad and general. I dunno. One of my less successful ventures in that direction.

Of course, today was the big reveal of the Scotland timetable for releasing lockdown. I won’t pretend I didn’t have a look, and a think about when I might get my hair cut, or I might be able to go out to lunch with someone. But in general, I think I’m reacting to a lot of this quite differently to other people. I just don’t see the point in booking anything now. Everything is uncertain, and the last thing we want is for the virus to start spreading again, and we are back in the cycle of boom and bust. I know that every single person probably thinks that their individual ‘movement’ makes no difference, but it’s a combination of movement and contacts that spread the virus, and it’s no one individual that makes the difference, but the aggregation of all of us. It’s pretty clear that domestically, within Scotland, the virus was at very low and containable levels last summer. It was mobility that brought it back to the levels that threatened the NHS and made the lives of NHS staff well nigh intolerable. And killed a lot of people. That doesn’t make it necessarily easier to contemplate the longer restrictions, but to me the Scottish government’s approach is making more sense. As things stand, people are now treating the English timetable as set in stone and are booking things left right and centre. At least some of that will lead to disappointment if the promise to be driven by data not dates is delivered upon (although I doubt it will be...now the pressure to open up is just too great). Another factor is that I hate to feel like I’m somehow in a hidden competition for a scarce resource (such as campsites or holiday homes). It makes me feel anxious. I’d rather take my time and see what’s possible, and when it’s possible. Anyway, that’s got that off my chest. Let’s see where we are this time next year. Still wearing face-coverings, for sure. For now, I will just live in the moment as much as I possibly can. Thinking about COVID stopped me sleeping last night, and I hate it when that happens. A better mindset is needed before bedtime tonight.

I’m reading Luckenbooth, and I’m not loving it. But I will have to plough on, as it’s the Book Group choice.