Imminent vandalism

Here we are in the Fishermen's car park on the Ness Walk in Inverness. That's the River Ness, obviously, the route by which Nessie goes shopping for the groceries.

Highland Council has an Arts Working Group. Since it exists, it has to Do Art. Now I'm all for genuine art, creative and performing, though not so keen on the sort where the creator has to explain what it is, and you say "oh, really?" and roll your eyes. So, Art having to be Done, there have to be Projects. The one before last was going to be a sort of see-saw, sticking out over the river. Visitors would walk out on to it to make it tip up and down. very Artistic. Project shelved in the face of public ridicule.

The latest wheeze, though, is to dig up all this lovely greenery in the heart of the city and install an "amphitheatre landmark" called the Gathering Place. This means tearing up the current grassed area and covering it with hard landscaping. Hurrah! At a cost of £758,350 for "internationally renowned arts consultants". Double hurrah!

Draw a veil over the renowned consultants forgetting any provision for disabled access. And over the fact that, as they're getting rid of the car park, disabled people won't be able to get there anyway. But it's Art, you see.

Now contemplate the bursaries that £758,350 could have provided for young, local talented art students.