It's Hogwarts, Jim, but not as we know it

For some time now, the woman-writer-most-in-need-of-an-editor has had the monopoly of the word wizard. 

Okay, ignore the hyperbole.

But move over Rowling, there is a new school in town. For Ottawacker Jr. might not be in Hufflepuff, Slytherin, Ravenclaw or Gryffindor, but he is being schooled by legendary card sharp and stern taskmistress Mrs. Ottawacker.

Good luck to him. It might have taken me 20-plus years, but I can hear the sound of cards being shuffled at 100 metres.