Good Friday Meditation

A Meditation that I wrote for Good Friday:

LORD,
As I think of you dying on the cross, and  as I look at your cross today,
I think of all the crosses I own.
The gold one - engraved so beautifully;
The silver one - plain but wonderfully faceted;
The one encrusted with diamonds;
The polished one - that looks perfect;
The holding cross - which I can feel with my hands;
The glass cross - given to me by a dear friend;
The cross I made one Good Friday
from two pieces of rough wood
and a few well-placed nails.
All these crosses so beautifully crafted
BUT........the reality of YOUR cross was very different.
The pain you suffered was so severe
that I am genuinely moved to tears
when I think of how you suffered for me.
Your back was ripped apart by the scourging
and I cannot begin to understand the pain,
the exhaustion, the loss of blood,
the severe cramps, the agony and
the difficulty in breathing you faced.
You were nailed to the cross and the strain on your wrists,
arms, body, shoulders and legs would have caused your lungs to collapse
and your heart almost fail.

The crown made of thorns was
pressed onto your head with such force
that it gouged out lumps of flesh
and then blood oozed down your face -
that sinless face -
but which was now disfigured by your own blood.
How can I even bear to look?
But I must look!
You were willing to suffer and die for me
on that cruel cross -
Not a beautifully carved cross,
but a rough-hewn one
with long, spiked nails holding you there
that brought pain and agony
to your whole body
You loved me SO much that you were willing
to endure all that shame and pain
so that I could be saved.
And even after all this you said,
"Father, forgive them............."

You, who was "without sin" was "made sin"
and died a criminal's death to save me,
Because you loved me.
WHAT sort of love is that?
WHO am I,
that you were prepared to die in my place?
You bore the sin of the world, because you loved us,
Because you loved ME.
Yet you died ALONE...
Cut off from God -
Calling out to Him,
"Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?"
"My God, my God,
why have you abandoned me?"
Your life was given for me,
Your blood was shed for me,
You died for me.
What can I do for you?

Lord, as I look at your cross today, and remember
how you died, help me NOT to sanitise it,
But - help me to understand that because of your death
your love lives on in me,
And for that reason
YOUR CROSS IS BEAUTIFUL.