Reason

And the reason for Berlin has finally arrived. My year check up from from ‘final’ surgery in September 2020, postponed from sept 2021, and again December 2021 and yet again in January 2022.
At last face to face with my surgeon which I was rather anxious about. My condition is long term and chronic and affected by stress and hormones so menopause and life in general acts as triggers that I cannot control. I do my best with healthy lifestyle and walking hours every week plus as much keto as I can stomach but it’s just like pissing in the wind against bloody nature. The swelling continues, the pain increases, bloody bloody nature
So he agreed it’s on the move again, like’ a nest of rats’ which came as no surprise however. He can help albeit another one or two ops
Gulp
Relieved he can help but the thought of going through it again …heavy hearted. The op is bad the recovery horrendous. Thinking time required as to can I or will I face this again.?

Home again via Copenhagen. Bit of a knuckle biter relying on the last Ryanair flight but midnight saw me back.
Relieved but lots to think about and a kidney or three to sell to fund it.
Fuck!