Please hold, your call is important to us

Yeah, right...

If my call was that important to you, you would aim at having it answered in less than 12 years. I have seen your company taken over several times while listening to Vivaldi's Four Seasons.

In the last decade that I have been on hold, I have spoken to a few useless operators in a time zone so different to mine that they don't usually quite know how to greet me (is it good morning or good evening, merry Christmas or happy Easter?) I forgive them, I don't sound all that perky myself on the phone at 3.40am...

The solution to my problem (the reason for my call -which started so long ago I am not sure myself any longer what it was) obviously cannot be found in the training manual provided by the outsourcing company 45 seconds before the "customer service reprensentatives" were given a brand new headset and an old keyboard to make clickety sounds (to pretend that they are typing something in a computer that does not exist).

They need to call their supervisor, who was hired 3 hours before by the same outsourcing company, and who is therefore considered senior enough to supervise a team a 50 newbies. That will be another six years of Vivaldi. But I won't put the phone down, oh no, I am a man of principles, I'll show them that I can beat the system, I have taken names along the way and written them down!