We Made It

Such a hard day....

The last day of college brought up so many emotions. I've been dreading the end for months, but resigned myself to the fact that it was coming, and that there was nothing I could do to change that. I've been here for four continuous years studying, it will be strange not to return in September. 

It was hotter today, the beginning of the latest heatwave, and we were the last, and possibly the only group in college. It was overshadowed a little by one of my lovely friends, whose mum died the previous weekend. It was so upsetting seeing her in so much pain, and she wasn't sure she was going to even come in, but I was glad that she did. There were lots of tears all round, and a few activities. We had to think about the journey through all of the levels, and share them with the group. We had to bring in an object that represented our own journey too. I chose a card and a printed out a message that Helen had given me. I cried when I shared them, because although I know she'd be proud of me, it feels a bit tainted, as someone who was there at the beginning isn't here at the end. We all shared different songs as well, and there were more tears all around...

They printed out cards for each of us, and we went around and wrote nice messages in all of them. It was lovely to read them privately later. We had a group photo, presented our three tutors with flowers, and gin glasses as well as gin ;-) I did my own card for one of the tutors who has been my rock throughout. I'll miss her the most. 

We left at 1:30pm as we had made a reservation for lunch. It was hard but I'm trying to look at the positives. I haven't finished my hours (currently at 59 as the course ends) so in a sense it feels unfinished, but pretty soon I'll hold that qualification just like my tutors, and I hope this is just the beginning. I'm hoping to qualify before Christmas, which if things carry on the way that they are, seems likely. 

When I hugged my favourite tutor, she whispered "it doesn't stop here" and I've held on to that. It's just the beginning.