E.T. Phone Home

My parents got divorced when I was really little. My entire family took part in raising me... and really, it took a village with me. When you look up strong willed child in the dictionary there is a picture of me and I bet some horrific tales of me. If we're going on total honesty, I would say that they are not really done yet. I could still use a little raising.

When I was little I loved E.T. It was the first movie I can remember seeing in the theatre. I was SO excited. I loved Drew Barrymore, I wanted to be her. I cried at the end. When I say I loved E.T., I mean I loved HIM. Not the movie, the little grey guy. I had a wild imagination and I was pretty sure he was real. As an only child that was back and forth and all over the place I ached for a constant companion, and E.T. really seemed ideal. Especially because he could fit in the basket on the bike that I did not have.

We left breakfast and saw him on the wall today. I felt all warm inside. Even as a grown up the idea of a constant companion pulls at my heart. Especially one that fits in the basket on the bike... that I still do not have.

I also think maybe I am not very grown up.

I feel underdeveloped on the inside sometimes. Idealistic, hopeful, easily hurt, ignorantly courageous, honest to a fault, still strong willed, still need the village to "raise me"... And like a child I think people find it initially endearing, but not as easy to live with. And that has hurt more than normal lately, and like a child I feel embarrassed for how I feel.

When I get home I am going to buy a bike, with a basket.