Golden Barrel Cactus

In my backyard...

Did you hear about the cactus that went to the party?
He spiked the drinks.

What do you call a pig stuck in a cactus? A porcupine.

What do you call it when a whole bunch of cactus fall over? A cac-tas-trophy.

I trusted my cactus, but it seems that he just stabbed me in the back.

The cactus forgot his way back home when he decided to go on a solo adventure. He was in quite a prickle.