Spot the Birdie

Kinda needed today. The forecast a few days back had been for a gentle south-easterly, sunshine, and 17 degrees. On the basis of that I'd booked tickets on the train to Leuchars, with me then riding to Errol to see some Bearded Tits/Reedlings in the reedbeds there, before carrying on to Perth for the train home. What I got was a stonking westerly, virtually no sun, and some frustratingly heard-but-unable-to-see Beardies. So you get a Sedge Warbler in the reeds instead, which is at least new for the BlipBigYear.

In truth I hadn't realised the reedbeds were quite so immense, so even with an estimated 250 pairs here, we were seriously in the realms of needles and haystacks.

The ride was quite good, even with the headwind, and late-in-the-day steepness (which in itself was worth it for the view as well as getting to follow a stoat bounding down the road for 100m once near the top). The problem is I'm letting everything get on top of me at the moment, so every time I stopped my mind took over and raced about all over the place.

In the last few weeks I've been told variously, by a number of different people, that I lack attention to detail, that I've lied, that I'm a disappointment, that I'm weak, that I let people down, that I'm a dreamer, that, that, that, that... It's noticeable that on holiday, and for a week or so after, I'd got my writing mojo back, but have barely touched the keyboard in creativity in the last 7 days. Today was time just to be by myself. I'd hoped for clarity of thought, but really just got myself worked up about things - and so even that 20% hill was welcome cos all I could think of was if it was physically possible to push your lungs back down into your chest.

Perhaps today was a reminder of what's important in life. And a reminder of just how bloody unlucky I am at organising rides around the weather.

p.s Worth noting that I can ride about 35 miles in comfort without cycle specific undergarments. Today I rode 45 miles.... However my new fancy Rapha gear performed flawlessly (indeed, more than that, giving contemplation as to why it costs as much as it does).