I got ramblin' on my mind

Imagine that! A whisky festival, and just along the road. That's pronounced, chust along the ... what was I saying?
Aye, whisky festival! All May apparently. What about that Queen's speech? I know, I know, Alex Ferguson, that's all anyone wants to talk about. The big news of the day has overshadowed everything, so it has. Apart from the whisky festival at the diggery dogs. Did you know about that? I buttonholed Kevin, so I did. He needs proper tasting notes for his skilfully selected 40 whiskies. I could churn them out for him, so I could. As I told him. And one for yourself. And a packet of peanuts.
What about David Moyes? I'd have gone for Jim Jeffries. Seriously, I would have. Not as a manager, mind. More as a barman. Or bouncer, even.
And then it was Thursday.