Non-Polish Furniture Polish

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellow,

With Lisa's return, we had to fix up the Edinburgh Four of Caro, Lisa, Loulou and Mo for reminiscences and drinks and fish and chips. 

Tiger and me remained on the sidelines and listened to the stories of distant debauchery. Although we had a few tales ourselves.

Mine, you have already heard, but Tiger had a great story about vodka that he shared with us. 

Apparently he used to work with a couple of Polish blokes who (obviously) loved vodka. They could brew their own and boasted they could make vodka from anything. Tiger and his non-Polish workmates decided to test them by asking for bizarre ingredients.

"I think courgettes and boiled sweets was the most out-there combination we asked for," he said. "It tasted disgusting, but you could make out the boiled sweets and courgettes."

Years later, he was in New York and met a Russian lady. He told her his Polish vodka story.

"PWUH!" said the Russian lady. "Polish wodka taste like SHEET!" she insisted. 

Tiger explained that the point of the challenge wasn't to make good vodka, but vodka from bizarre ingredients.

"HA!" said the Russian lady. "Courgettes! Boiled sweets! PWUH! I ken make wodka from CHAIR!"

Tiger accepted her challenge to come back one week later and drink vodka made from one of her dining room chairs. The week passed and he returned to find one of her chairs with large chunks planed out of it. 

"And what did it taste like?" asked Mo.

"Furniture polish," replied Tiger. "But I have to give her credit. She made vodka from furniture."

The Christmas lights around the room twinkled. The room grew dark. And soon it was time for the Edinburgh Four to break up again. 

"It's just like picking up again right where we left off," marvelled Lisa. 

It's true. Things really don't change much between friends. Time can pass but friendship never will. 

S.