At the start of the year my employer announced that we could all have free birthdays, which means that we can take a day off work within a fortnight of our birthday without it coming from our annual leave allowance. That's a nice thing to do!
It doesn't excuse us from the cake expectation though.
I investigated the possibility of having bacon rolls and vegan equivalents delivered to the office at breakfast time on the day of my absence, but that was going to set me back something in the region of £100. Sorry, no, not doing that. I looked at supermarket cakes and they were dreadful, as well as awkward to transport by bicycle, and so I finally settled for this selection – an eighth of the price of the original idea, easily transportable and went down a storm. So that was a result!

What I hadn't expected on my return to work was an amendment to my contract of employment. Just before Xmas my notice period had been verbally extended from two weeks to four weeks, I assumed that was mutual and took it to mean that I had completed my probation period. Apparently not. My notice period has now been extended to eight weeks, I have not necessarily passed my probation period and my employers retain the right to give me only two weeks notice of dismissal. Their notice period doesn't extend to eight weeks until I have completed two whole years of continuous employment.
Pause for affronted gasps.
However, I am paid weekly, one week in arrears. It's not rocket science.