If I'd had a gun

I'd have been tempted to shoot the bloody pheasant that ate all - all! - the new shoots of two of my David Austin roses. I think I was so upset because last year it was the deer that ate them, and this year I'd had visions of beautiful, strong roses in full bloom. I have over 30 roses, and so Richard and I set about trying to protect them, we erected these cages around them. The rose in the photo is a lovely pink one called Anne Boleyn, I've put her in a cage to stop her heads being chopped off - ho ho.

The only reason that pheasants are here is to be shot, poor things. And the female is pale and timid and anxious, she glances fearfully around corners as if she knows that she's going to be shot. No, if I had a gun, I wouldn't shoot the pheasant. The rose will survive.