Birthday Suit*

In those days she was made to take a photo of herself and she looked and she cringed. And then she tried to process herself in such a way it matched up with how she thought she looked.
It failed.
In those days she realised the big, bigger, biggest clothes were not just bearer of tags you'd cut out to hide the truth. Those sizes were what she was.
And it was not good.

Then it was decided; she would not become a 47-year old vegetative blob of a woman.

The first steps weren't too hard - that's why they went first: pop and fast food.

Then a diet was found and adopted.
Then came exercise.

Months passed. Months filled with fruit and vegetables. 655 Kilometers worth of running, cycling and (recently and delightfully) Zumba. 38,556 Extra calories were burned.

Today I am NOT the 47-year old vegetative blob of a woman I was afraid of becoming.
Today I am a 47-year old, active, 50 lbs slimmer, healthier and even almost muscular (*gasp*) version of her . I am making better choices, not just with what I eat, but also with what I do with my time. My headaches are mostly gone, my stress levels down, my moods stabilised (mostly ;))

There is a long road ahead; I am not yet where I should be both mentally and physically and when I am I shall remain on the road because I can't allow myself to wander too far; I know the risks.
Fortunately I have met people on this journey that I know will be there to keep me going straight - and I have a Beloved who is proud and supportive.

Happy birthday to me - here's to many, many, many more!


* it really is a bathing suit, in case someone thinks they can spot actual nudity.