Fiji

That was our week in Fiji.  Except for our laundry - remember that?  Well it turned up a day or two later with all the stains it had originally plus on or two new ones.  Caro was "deeply disappointed" and threatened to write, "An Official Letter".

On our last morning we awoke eagerly, awaiting our departure and took a freezing cold shower each.  ("Well that brought my nipples up, although my scrotum appears to have vanished” I commented bitterly.)  And were then p*ssed off by the Courtesy Bus, and I use that term loosely.  We bought tickets for it to take us to the airport, but the driver didn't feel like it on the day and flatly refused.  We took a taxi instead.

My advice to you is that if you're ever going to Fiji, you should stay in a little place called Hawaii instead, but oops I’m getting ahead of myself.  I shall leave this chapter with Caro's words to me on departing Nadi airport:

"Fiji.  You can shove it up yer &rse."