Smudgy

Smudgy patterns in the burn. Realized I enjoy these sorts of images because they look to me like the sound of the running water, a sort of synesthesia.

Otherwise a mood of unsettledness. Always interesting.

I saw my lovely G.P. for the last time today. Made an appointment just to say goodbye and to give him David Whyte's The Three Marriages. Came home wondering why the world seems different when people move on out of our lives, palpably different somehow.

Unsettled too because my camera died, screen gone black. It had been making that sickly grinding noise that ailing computers make for some time. Today it ground its teeth no more. I'm compulsively onto replacement via Ebay but if I disappear for a bit you'll know why. Sat there wondering when a camera became a necessity. For most of my life I did not own one.

Then I found I was in a mood for a square crop. What the heck is that? How can I want a square crop, like you'd fancy a particular food? Where did this appetite come from?

And Vivian Maier on Imagine last night. So much to think about in an excellent programme. Trying to imagine the state of focussed equanimity she must have been in to take such extraordinary photographs within the limits of the technology available in her day. It's the thing I most enjoy about Blip. The unique quality of each person's perception, selection, reflection.

Just as well I won't be taking photos for a bit, too much to think about.

#am writing (and writing, and writing some more)