Eventually

It took me over 6 hours to get to Starbucks today. I wanted to move but I couldn't. I just lay staring into space, sometimes in tears, loosing hour after hour.
I moved several times but had the overwhelming urge to sit or lie back down. Even gave up in the shower and just sat and let the water fall on me.
Once in Starbucks I wondered what I was doing there and just wanted to be back at home.

This date last year my work closed and I was made redundant, tonight the five of us are meeting up; I really want to go but I know it is going to be a huge struggle.