Thank you Pauline

I'm not going to lie it's been a tough few weeks.
I wasn't going to write about it, but ultimately this is my journal - its where I record things, it's become an extension of my memory.
It started with a fairly major health scare, in the middle of dealing with that I was horribly let down by someone I thought I could trust and then in quick succession we lost two of our regular walkers to suicide. All of that ran into, and was multiplied by, a lung infection and a very unpleasant reaction to some antibiotics it turns out I should never have been given.
And suddenly for the first time in years I heard the siren call of the abyss, felt the short sharp bite of the old black dog.
A week ago I sat on the rocks in this favourite place and really didn't think I could see a way forward. As the meds have left my system and I've come to terms with the loss of a friendship and much more, I've felt a bit better, but getting up and out - well that has been hard to be honest. 

And then, this morning Pauline, one of our Walkers, took me to one side and with a squeeze of my arm said "you might enjoy listening to this..." She couldn't have known (or of course she knew) but I can't say how much it's helped. Today I sat on a rock by the lake and everything made just a little bit more sense.

If you've got 4 minutes & 7 seconds to spare then I urge you to listen to Pauline - it might just be the best thing you hear this week, Kx

(& for those of you who don't know, Wellness Walks is the organisation I founded) 


https://wellnesswalks.org.uk/case-study-pauline-cumbria/