Slippery Slope

The number one most played song on my iTunes play list is this one. For some reason I have also been listening a lot to this one also. I really love The Lightening Strike by them also...

So today we were in all sorts of parts of Rhode Island. We walked along Cliff Trail or Walk or something in today - somewhere in the vicinity of MILES AND MILES and MILES.

Truth... the truth is that my heart is beating harder even as I type. Today there was this place where you could walk down 40 steps to an overlook. So I did. But I got to the bottom of the 40 steps and I could see that there was this beautiful cave that was further down around the side and I wanted a shot. My favorite Blip of all time was the one that I took in Lebanon of the fisherman, and as you all know, that required some courage. So what were a few steps and a little trek around to the side? Except I slipped. Multiple times. I slid down into the water. I scraped up my body. I ruined my favorite white v neck, my jeans and my shoes were soaked and there were miles left on the hike... and I did not get the shot.

Even in the moment, I knew that it was a life lesson.

Sometimes you take the risk and you don't get the win. Sometimes you take the risk and you loose. It happens. And it's not the end of the world. It's just life.

Yesterday a friend came in to see me in Boston from New York. He took a bus. He stayed 5 hours, he went back. My eyes are still watering.

I don't know why.

I could tell you what we talked about. I could tell you why it felt significant. I could tell you how encouraged I was, and that I cried for half an hour after we dropped him off at the bus station and how silly I feel. I could... but I can't. Words wouldn't be enough and I am not sure I get it. I know that today when I thought about it, for some reason these lyrics played again and again in my head and somehow they just feel right;

it's from TLS - SP, III Daybreak and even that is so apropos.

And in the middle of the flood I felt my worth
When you held onto me like I was your little life raft
Please know that you were mine as well
Drops of water hit the ground like God's own tears
And spread out into shapes like
Salad bowls and basins and buckets for bailing out the flood

Life is a slippery slope. This wild journey of Love that I live my life in feels like the algae that owned me today, sometimes I find my footing barefoot against all odds and get the shot... and sometimes I end up in the water with nothing... But in the end, I'd rather be in the water than behind the railing looking down at the slope.

I'm torn up. My skin stings. My hands are torn apart. But my heart is pounding. My eyes are wattery. My heart is alive. And I am breathing Love in.

JM - Say (you guys know I am a sucker for cliche pop music)
Even if your hands are shaking
And your faith is broken
Even as your eyes are closing
Do it with a heart wide open