Extubated

After 3 hours in the OR, they scoped his throat, the breathing tube came out, then he opened his eyes couldn't breathe, it went back in. Then they tried more steroids. And tried again. The tube came out. And stayed out. They put him on heliux air 12.8L. He was wheeled back to the intensive care room. He threw up old brown blood and water maybe 30x in my arms over 4 hours. The only thing he saud was "I'm ok" imitating what he was being told, then nothing more. He had 2 dedicated nurses at his bedside. I broke down. He was shaking, pulling hair, scratching, anxious. Suctioning, stopping him biting, like med withdrawal. They gave him a cocktail constantly trying new meds but nothing to calm him because they had to keep him alert. He spoke no words but a few signs mum and dad but not in any way reassuring. Then I fell asleep having no reserve left. One nurse remained with him all night in tandem.