The influence of Annie Lee

Before Swarovski crystal was supercool and before everything could be bought with the little crystals encrusted all over the place (perfume bottles, pens, false nails, teeth) my Nana collected it. It started with these beautifully cut spheroid balls that changed colour depending upon the light and the angle at which you viewed them. They were like mini Eden Project domes. For years, she acquired these, for herself and as gifts off her children and her grandchildren.

I have two of them - one for me and one for my brother - as keepsakes. Not that I need anything to remind me of her, but sometimes having something tangible is helpful. Still, on bad days, I wear my Grandad's sweatshirt. Strange girl that I am.

Anyway, the picture is one of them, on the shiny black worksurface in our kitchen with my green laser pen being shone at it. I was playing quickly to get a blip because I was otherwise short of anything inspired or creative.

After a night of very peculiar dreams - I suspect related to having taken a cocodamal before bed last night - I have been stupidly busy today and I suspect will know about it tomorrow.

I decided a while ago that the organisation of our kitchen cupboards was ineffective at best, stupid at worst. Today, Nana Lee exerted her influence on me. Having acquired some baking tins and some bath towels as part of the house clearing process, I decided today would be the day I sorted the kitchen out - I needed to because the place where I store my baking stuff was not to the standard that Nana would have accepted!

So cupboards have been emptied, cleaned, rearranged. Pans, food processor, casserole pots and serving dishes now have a new home. The tray storage under the oven is, for now, a shining example of cleanliness and good order.

I might just need to do some food shopping. That can wait till tomorrow.

10 loads of laundry have been done, including all of James' many blankets (2 loads in themself).

The recycling bin is full. But the kitchen is well ordered.

Along with that and 90 minutes at the gym, I earned myself an extra 1200 calories today. So I am rewarding myself with a glass of wine and a handful of salt and vinegar peanuts. Even with that, I have only consumed a little over the minimum calories for the day, having eaten 3 meals. Being very sensible - balanced diet...just weighing my portions out.

Hopefully soon I will start to see a difference...I feel more toned, just havent lost any weight. YET. It cannot fight me forever. One day I will return to my svelte self (although if the weight has gone where I think it has, then I might not actually want to lose it! haha)

Today marks the beginning of my 5th week of no smoking. I am less than a week from returning to work. I am managing on either 1 painkiller per day or none at all. I am happy with that at this stage as I know that it could still be months before I get to a point where the success of the operation can really be assessed. It's good enough for now and a huge leap forward from 4 months ago.