Surprise

Such horrible SHOCK and disillusionment* that everyone in our quaint little neighborhood aren't able to park their cars on the street and keep it unlocked without two young, hooded hoodlums of a very pale color, out on a crime spree**, brazenly rifling through their glove boxes looking for something of value. So much excitement and police calling and email sharing and endless tut, tutting and not a single person said: "Thank @#$%^! that they*** didn't steal my car since I basically put a sign on it and said COME AND GET IT!!." There's no excuse for stealing by someone who obviously has enough to eat and wears Nike hoodies. Early 4th of July deal shopping, I guess.

*sorry but what planet do you live on?
**spotted by a neighbor at 4:30am
***I usually refrain from saying THEY broke in as if I have some miraculous gift of knowing who the thieves were or I'm making some assumption about who they might be based on racial profiling but since they were spotted.....