Remembrance of Things Past

Our wedding photographer was pretty astute, realising that he was not a documentarian but a story-teller. What his customers required was images that projected an idyllic, idealised day, conforming to a template, regardless of what real events actually took place. He was creating memories in the sense of giving us images to project back upon the day, rather than reminders of our experience

Of course, there is a branch of psychology or cognitive science that says all memories are like this. We don't capture events in real time and hold them in immutable form. We construct them afterwards, based on an interpretation of what took place, influenced by our prejudices, our desires, our state of mind and many other factors. What's more, every time we revisit a memory, we rework it, potentially changing it. Witness statements immediately after the event are more reliable than those taken later. We are all unreliable witnesses of our own lives

The photographer got us to toast one-another, arms entwined. In the champagne flutes he put lager with a dash of washing-up liquid - because it gives a better colour in the picture. To create an image of the bride, contemplating the profundity of the threshold she was about to cross, he told MrsM to hold her wedding bouquet up to her chest, to tilt her head, stare into it and "look for the bee". Here's an image where you can play that game too