Drawing

basically one of the first ones in over 30 years. Like real free drawing. The assignment was draw your favorite animal. I had to give it a little twist. I hope I didn't go too far.

I managed to go swim in the morning but ever since I've been just too tired. I've really needed a rest today. I feel guilty about that, but I do I need a day.

Yesterday I talked to the newest edition on our ward. She's in the same training as I am, but has started in the spring. Her jaw dropped to floor when I told her about the schedule I was given. It feel really unfair. She and her class mates had 9 MONTHS of being and "extra" on the ward and  will be counted as one of the staff after 3 week from now. I had to do it the second day. I've taken so much responsibility over everything on the ward and what's my price for that? Losing my job at the end of the year. Well, as far as I know won't be giving a new contract.

Last night I was working on our ward and also helping out on the 6th. J over there heard about my situation and was amazed as there are people leaving during the end of the year. She told me to straight ask the boss. And she did walk past me and I just asked her. Just that J told me that there's two people leaving that floor could she possibly think of me getting to work there. The boss looked taken aback and stumbled something about having to see where one that is returning will go... My co-worker S was there and I asked how she took the very short conversation. She thought the boss looked surprised that I wanted to work there. I just replied that I'm willing to work in any floor (well part-time).

I feel that I've done so much without any support or training or help and now I'm just kept in the darkness and feel like I'm not treated equally. And feel kind of stupid about even wanting to work there. But I still do...