It's only a game

I’m listening to the ‘Edinburgh derby’ on the wireless. My football team, Hibernian are playing their city rivals, Heart of Midlothian. Hearts are second bottom of the league, but we are bottom. If we win, the places will be reversed. Hibernian were founded by aliens with green blood, 149 years ago. Their spacecraft had a faulty satnav, but when it landed on Leith links in 1875 they loved the green hue of the place, and decided to stay.
Pictured, Sir Patrick Stanton around 1972. (He had green blood too.)
WE’VE JUST SCORED! Bedlam at Easter Road.
Final score 1-1.