It's My Duty to Warn the Pup

Dear Noah, 

It has come to my attention that The Wretched One has made a purchase that I think you should be aware of.
I suspect she has her eye on your mohican, but the good news is: 1) it's very temporary & 2) due to your colouring, I don't think it will show up at all.
The bad news is:  She may resort to a professional to do the job for her....

Good Luck little pup.