Jaws of Borrowdale

Almost exactly a year ago I sat here in a favourite place, totally lost. Nearer to the bottom of the abyss than I'd been for a decade. 
That week I'd been told to prepare myself for the worst possible news. I'd turned to someone I loved for support, something I've so rarely been able to do in my life, and I was turned away, abandoned, the knife twisted. I'd looked to throw myself into leaving a legacy, building something good, but for a while it seemed like Wellness Walks would falter and fall. And lost in the dark that felt apt, deserved, the price I owed my fates for daring to think myself happy. 

I lost sight of the words I've tried to honour, words carved in to my skin, seared in to my soul. In the dark we forget so much, see so little, listen to the wrong voices. 
But. 

It can get better. 
I know, because it did. 

Other people noticed, reached out, I remembered there's love inherrent in the world. All steps back in to the light. I remembered that forgiveness and acceptance will always build strong foundations than despair or pain. 

If you're ever in the dark, or you feel lost or alone, know that you are not. There are people who care, people who'll sit with you to lessen the dark, who'll help you find a light to guide yourself home. There is love in the world and that matters. Kx.