Patterns

I have noticed I have a pattern to my day.

I have to physically talk myself out of bed, forcing my legs over the side. I feel sad, dread and tired. All morning I feel exactly the same, feeling like I am detached and looking on at everything going on around me. I feel I am minutes behind all conversation .

By lunch time I feel more awake but still a bit spaced out. The afternoon is better, feel a bit more motivated and 'with it'.

Evenings and night I dip again and feel exactly like the morning.

But most of all I just feel complete exhaustion and no matter what I do, I don't feel any relaxation.