Public loo checklist

Since starting my current role I have developed and evolved a public toilet checklist.
This helps me to remain regular and comfortable and prevents situations such as the Birmingham incident where I had to call out for loo roll.

Today the joys of Doncaster station
- quick scan of facilities as I enter for signs of obvious damage / warning signs - CHECK
- no strange people 'hanging around' - CHECK

Onto cubicle
- scan general cleanliness of said cubicle (floor (numerous incidents) loo (one in three unacceptable) cubicle walls (Bristol incident)) -CHECK
- loo roll -CHECK
- loo roll can be got out from holder - CHECK
- working flush - CHECK
- hook for bag - CHECK

Ok and relax.... notice something warm on back of leg ...remember final check

- adjust self to cope with the seats with a cut away front section to avoid weeing on own clothes - DARN

Luckily the nice people of Doncaster didn't seem mind a me rinsing a section of my chords in the sink or drying them for half hour whilst I stood in my pants, although a few people did scan the room upon walking in and walked out....