Hiya.

Sorry i haven't been blipping much lately i've been so tired and so ill, and so worried, and so stressed, I've missed you.

I miss her.

I'm not looking forward to my mum coming home from the hospital, it means I have to be in every single weekend.

But I will be seeing Bethan soon for a catch up on college crack and general banter. I have been with Bex alot lately getting wrecked in every sense of the word. on a two day comedown as I type, I am lonely at college.

I feel low again like I did last year, spending my money to get out my face to forget everything. I am just a ball of stress. 2 essays written today which is a huge deal as I never write essays, i did well I think personally, plus I was the only person to actually do them which is something.

Made a new friend called Sarah Jean.. She's absolutely lovely, also made friends with a girl called Megan, I like Megan she's funny. So many people at college now, and I absolutely despise it, as I walk around surrounded by the hundreds of new people I just want to run away to the quayside and breathe in the river air however filthy it might be, just need to escape and lose my mind because when i'm surrounded by all those people, I have never felt more alone.

I miss her. She's my stress ball, give her a squeeze and i'm content.

~

Look what they've done to my Brain, Ma. Look what they've done to my brain. They picked it like, a chicken bone and they, think i'm half insane. Maybe i'll be alright, Ma. Maybe i'll be okay, and if the people, are buying tears, then we'll be rich some day, Ma, look what they've done, to my soul.