Look away if squeamish

I can't even begin to explain these injuries without people saying "uhm how has she made it through 25 years?"

However, my right thumb was quite deeply cut so I have nail glued it shut, but blood came through the nail glue. Is that normal? I assumed it was liquid tight, skin and glue. I remember my gp telling me hospital glue is pretty much superglue (or something along those lines) and its not that far from my nail. I can't bend my thumb now. And both are bruising quite badly. They are so necessary for texting! And so many other things. Poor thumbs. It's an excellent start to the week...

(Leaving you all to wonder how the heck it happened. If anyone guesses I will actually visit and high four (not five cos of thumb injury) you wherever you are. )