One...

To Two.

Yesterday, I lost A's shoe, today I found it.

F, did nothing better happen today.

Oh it did, I got insulted by a F'in numpty! And it made me nearly BURST!!!

Had to pause and think of dolphins swimming in the sea, before telling them in fact they were a B F F N B - answers on a postcard

Thanks nursery for finding the shoe - in the car park!