Ode to Bums on Seats

The settee before, had a wee secret store,
To stash Christmas presents and gifts galore,
To keep them from us kids moseying about,
But we soon grew up and sniffed them out.
The 80's arrived and brought these two seats,
Strong, bold and wooden, pre-ikea chic ,
Alas the traintrack carpet was also replaced,
So my Lego city scapes were also displaced.
To the teenage years, lounging and lolling,
Vegging at movies and soap plots unfolding,
Skiving school cross country with pals eating toast,
This Morning or Trisha, we slagged off them both,
And then on to Dave and my times a-courting,
With big Corrie dog between us, growling.
Aye, if those seats could talk, it is reported,
They'd be heavy with stories about the bahookies they've supported,
Tis time for the seats to move on to phase two,
Kindling, fabric remnants and recycled padding too,
My nephew has broken the seats up for my mum,
And sent me this picture to remember them from.