Rupert Advent, you BASTARD!

Rupert Advent was born in 1896.
From an early age he started hating humanity.
But he had a particular hatred for children. And their parents.
His heroes were Vlad the Impaler and Ivan Pavlov.

He invented the Advent calendar in 1927.

He derived great joy from conditioned reflexes and early obsessive behavior in children aged 3 to 9.

Sibling rivalries and threats of physical violence around bit-size piece of poor quality chocolate were music to his ears.

I hate the bastard.
I hope that he marinates in hell, in a cauldron of molten low grade chocolate.

This morning, just like every other morning since 1 December (weekends included...), Finn has been up at 6.15 AM to open his advent calendar.
I have offered to give him a whole bar of Lindt Excellent 50% cocoa if he promised to stay in bed in the morning.
He declined...
Kids... tsk... what muppets...