In the City!

More mess to sort out in the City. Send for Pensioner! This £1.4Tr UK national debt; how much should Scotland pay, post-independence - that's the question. Bloody Salmond bigging up our affluence and oil - I've had to spend all afternoon downplaying it all. We're mair broke than youse, said I, banging the mahogany. Methadone's nae cheap! And the murders our polis have tae solve! Never mind all they prisoners to look efter.
The meeting was adjourned after I carelessly spilled my third can of special brew. Youse no throwin the towel in? Literally like, eh. Haw haw. How are we gonna mop this up? C'mon boys, cheer up yis are a lang time deid. Nae poakets inna shroud! Is that a decent boozer ower the way?
Good work this, if you can get it.