Today

When I asked The Chief how he earned this award today, he said it was for helping to keep the younger kids in the back of the playground at break as they were not allowed at the front today. This sounds unusual but not when you understand that my boys go to the same school as Mikaeel Kular did.

The last few days have been surreal. This morning I had to head off a Sky news reporter complete with microphone and cameraman as I tried to get scooter boy through the school gates. My instinctive reaction was to give him my best F-off look and a Jerry Springer style hand gesture as I said an emphatic 'No'. I found the idea of talking to any of the assembled journalists quite repellant and realised I was shaking as we trundled into the playground.
I don't know the family but I was familiar with Mikaeel from the playground as was my youngest since he liked to scooter up by the nursery at school pick up time. 'I know him' he said quietly on Thursday spotting the boys face on the internet after coming home with a note from the school which detailed the 'scarey thing' which then kept him from sleeping for the next few nights. He finds it hard to make sense of the real world at the best of times, this just completely threw him. If we adults are struggling to come to terms with what has occurred so close to home then it is no wonder scooter boy has been off his food for the last few days.

None of us know what has really happened other than a small boy is dead and his family in turmoil. Our school has lost one of its own and that in itself is painful to deal with but we are supporting and being supported by the community that surrounds us. We are all shocked and stunned but that is because we care.

I have debated with myself whether to share this but it has had such an impact on us all that to carry on blipping and pretend it hasn't happened would be worse. Goodbye Mikaeel, you have touched the lives of so many, rest in peace now.