IVF Journey: 21w3d pregnant

This is my IVF diary. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for four years now, and have a diagnosis of 'unexplained infertility'. We have finally reached the top of the waiting list for IVF - a form of assisted conception. I'm blogging about what happens as it happens, as a kind of therapy for me and as an awareness raising exercise of what IVF is all about.

For the last five years I have swum three times a week. After work I’ve walked to the bus stop, got the bus to near the pool, walked to the pool, swum about a kilometre, then reversed the journey. I never thought anything of it.

Until I got this frickin pregnancy nausea and couldn’t manage the walk to the bus stop, let alone the bus journey, let alone the swim itself.

I’m gutted about this, I had these big ideas that I’d have a really healthy pregnancy, keep the weight gain minimal, be nice and fit for the birth.

Nope. Too much for me, too hard, too demanding. Gutted.

I’ve kept up my membership though, still been paying the fee, because I’ve been ever hopeful I’d get back into it. The minute I felt up to it I was sure I’d go.

But I’ve not felt up to it.

I’d thought I might go yesterday but I couldn’t face it. Still too much. I’m still so tired and it feels so intimidating.

But today was the day! For the first time since October I made the journeys and did the swim, all by myself. No being driven there, no supervision, no safety net.

Hurray! Three cheers!

I hope I might be able to manage this twice a week from now on.

Gotta tell you it wiped me out though.