The great divide...

... or divoid as we say around here.

Gulls in square one (clockwise, those with digital watches can pick a random square) have flown in from the open sea because they afraid of the approaching gale forces winds.

Gulls in square two are going out to sea because they were mad enough to trust the Met Eireann weather forecast more than their own instinct. Natural selection will take care of them, these will not reproduce. If only the same could be said of Met Eireann...

Gulls in square 3 are permanent suburban gulls. One can tell from their little fringe combed forwards, the half crown rings on their beaks and the Umbro logos on their wings. They do not eat fish anymore. Well not with with eyes and tails anyway. They eat it battered and dripping with cooking oil.

Gulls in square 4 are magpies dressed as gulls. They should not be trusted. Either as magpie or as gull.

The gull at 3 o'clock (those with digital watches can forget about it) is sitting on the fence (or the phone line in this case).
It would like to go out to sea with the suicidal-we-trust-Met-Eireann gulls but decides at the last minute to opt for spliffs and a can of cider with the suburban gulls. A life saving move! (who would have thought...)